Monday, July 02, 2007

Don't Worry, I'm Looking After the Kids ...

Hi. Yeah. She’s not here. Mrs. Chicky. She left. She went on vacation. And she asked me (Mrs. Fortune) to blogsit. And here I am, fulfilling my bloggerly duty. And I’m not even getting $2.50 an hour!

When I got a request from my friend to fill in on this here blog of hers, I did think back to my own babysitting days. Between the ages of 12 and 17, many unsuspecting parents had the bad judgment to leave their children in my care. Really, it’s a wonder that no children were ever killed or (seriously) injured while under the gaze of my not-very-watchful eye. As I saw it, my responsibilities as a babysitter were as follows:

  • Run up your phone bill
  • Eat all the junk food in your house
  • Rummage through your drawers looking for any of the following: alcohol, porn, drugs, fireworks
  • Check to see if any of your teenage neighbors are cute
  • Prevent the children from killing themselves

In that order. Sometimes I accomplished most of them. But now that I am in the position to actually hire a teenager or two to watch my kid for a few hours, I find myself hoping above hope that kids today aren’t as crappy as I was then. Not that I have much in the way of alcohol, drugs, or fireworks in the house, but still.

Maybe I should take comfort in the fact that today’s teenagers earn more than $2.50 an hour. Don’t higher wages translate to better services?

Maybe I should take comfort in the fact that the kids in my neighborhood seem really responsible. Certainly I didn’t appear to have it so together at their age?

Or maybe … I’ll just let my parents keep on doing all the babysitting. I mean, at least they won’t go telling all the neighbors about the stuff they find in my drawers …

11 comments:

Erica said...

I love "Don't tell mom the babysitter's dead". My brother and sister and I watch it every time it's on tv. Good Luck with the babysitter...if you hire one.

Anonymous said...

That list cracked me up, because those were my priorities as a babysitter too. Oh, except I also went through all the books on their bookshelves looking for anything even remotely "dirty".

We live in a neighborhood of mostly retirees who have lived here since the mid-50s, and families with young children moving in. There are NO babysitters! It seems like when I was little, my parents had no problem finding a neighbor girl to watch us.

Anonymous said...

Great. I'm in the market for my first babysitter ever and I am totally discouraged!

I do NOT need teenage girls going through my crap....

I did love that movie though.

Anonymous said...

Okay, wait...who's writing this? I'm so confused! Must be the hangover talking.

Lawyer Mama said...

Um, yeah, that's pretty much what I did as a babysitter too. BUt I'm in denial. My sitters do not go through my things looking for porn. My sitters do not go through my things looking for porn. If I repeat it enough times will it make it true?

painted maypole said...

will you tell us what you find in Mrs. Chicky's drawers?

I never looked for porn. Honestly. But one day I picked up a bag of chips, and there it was, right under the bag of chips, on the table next to the couch. I think I might have screamed and dropped the bag.

erin said...

"The dishes are done, man." That movie is so funny! I lucked out with sitters--I have cousins who happen to love my children (for some reason) and will sit for free. It doesn't hurt that she has a Child Development-ish degree (almost) and for free! I have 3 kids so babysitting usually costs more than the actual date!

Anonymous said...

That movie image brings back so many memories. That was a great flick!

Don't let the Mrs. Chicky's blog stay up too much later than bedtime. ;)

Jane, P&B Girls

Fairly Odd Mother said...

Ahhhh, yes, I remember those days too well. There was one family whose father left his Playboys on the coffee table. Another had NO tv, but had a giant "JOY OF SEX" volume in their bedroom.

And then there was the family of a DENTIST whose house was so disgusting---the kids used to find old donuts under the couch, and eat them. No way I'd ever let him near my mouth. Gag.

Good times.

ewe are here said...

My husband expressed shock last night when I told him kids started babysitting around the age of 12 or 13. Here, I think they're 'supposed to be' 16.

Good babysitters really are hard to find.... We're still only using family members so far, although I do have number.... Hmmmmm.

mo-wo said...

I remember what a nosy babysitter I was. I don't think we will ever go out, really.