Who is that woman staring back at me from the mirror? She looks familiar, but I can't quite place her. She sort of looks like me, but...
No... It can't be.
It IS!
Its... My Mother!
[rubbing my eyes]
[squinting]
Okay, that's better. There I am. Blonde hair, hazel eyes. Good smile. Should have worn that retainer a little longer when I was a kid because my teeth are a tiny bit crooked now. But, hey, it gives me character. That's not my Mom after all.
*blink, blink*
Wait a minute... this woman in front of me has dark circles under her hazel eyes. And there are fine lines at the corners. Her skin is starting to loose some of that youthful glow - and no amount of Jergens Natural Glow facial moisturizer is going to help that cause. There is gray around her hair line. Now I know that can't be me... I just went to the salon on Saturday.
[moving closer to the mirror]
When did this happen? When did I become this woman who looks a lot like the other, older womenfolk in my family? When I looked in the mirror I used to see a 22 year old girl staring back. Now when I look in the mirror I see an adult, a mature woman, a *shudder* grown-up. In a word - my Mom. Never before in my life could I have ever been accused of looking like her. At least not by people who were sober or not under the influence of psychotropic drugs. From the neck up we were completely different - she was dark, I am fair. If not for the fact that she bore me from her womb, most people would never have known that we were even related. So, how - and when - did I become her?
I wonder if it happened so gradually that I just didn't recognize the transformation, or did it happen quickly due to the fact that I am now, myself, a mother. All women know that we will eventually become like our mothers, I guess I just never expected to start looking so much like her. I mean, its not a bad thing to look like a woman who, until her late 40's was often accused of not looking old enough to have adult children... But its still tripping me out. And I don't really know why. I think its an identity thing. I've never, really, looked like anybody in my family. There is not one person in my large collection of relatives that you could point to and say "That one. Your second Aunt on your Mom's side. That's the one you most resemble." I guess I look a bit more like my Dad then anyone else, but only because we both seem to physically carry the Scottish/English genes of our ancestors. There's actually a joke in my family that I was actually the mailman's kid.
Okay, its not a very funny joke, but you need to know my family's humor.
Chicky Baby, though she is beginning to resemble me, is still very much her father's daughter. But she too, one day, will gaze into the mirror and see me staring back at her. I wonder how she will feel about that. I was a lot older, at 32, when I had her then my Mom was when she had me at 20. At what age will she see me staring back at her from the depths of the looking glass?
And, more to the point, will she like it?
Tuesday, March 21, 2006
Mirror, mirror on the wall... who the hell is that?
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14 comments:
Yes, Chicky Baby will love it.
Oh Chicky! (can I call you Chicky? I'm not being fresh am I?)
You took the words right out of my mouth. I thought my camera has been broken for the past year, but EVERY photograph taken since The Boy was born does not look like me. It's my mom.
And it freaks me out.
So much so, that I never look in the mirror anymore.
Weirder yet, I look more like my stepmother than my mother.
Almost as scary as looking like your mom?
Thinking like her. The other day I was nagging my daughter to "put on a jacket! It's cold outside! You'll freeze!" It was like, 70 degrees.
I've noticed it too! Although people could swear I was adopted (I look exactly like my dad, not at all like my mom), I'm starting to find glimpses of her in me. And oh, do I talk like her now! Suddenly everything she said when I was a kid makes sense!
Cordy won't have a choice when she gets older - she looks just like me.
same thing going on over here. a recent phenomenon. ha!
Oh, my...oh, my...
I have always resembled my father's women...but I saw my mother's legs a short while back...attached to my body! It was an out-of-body experience!!
It sneaks up on you doesn't it? I still can't reconcile that woman in the mirror with ME. And I never looked like anyone in my family either (but that's because I'm adopted...lol)
Wow, you are all giving me a preview of what to look forward to! But I have always looked like my mother, sometimes it's spooky - if you look at pictures of her when she was 3 and me at the same age you can not tell us apart.
But Chicky, I think you're talking about something more here, than just physical resemblance, no? Do you like it?
RH - Yes, call me Chicky. I am the original Chicky, which is another story for another time.
Mrs. Fortune - Very perceptive. Its the age thing, I think. Moms are supposed to be old. At least, to a kid they are. Though, my Mom never looked old, she was still older than me. Tough to explain. I guess I need more time with my therapist. LOL
And, yes, I like looking like my Mom... She was beautiful and had a fabulous body! What's not to like? :)
I used to be fascinated w/my mom's ass b/c it is big but very flat at the same time. Not so impressive when it's now on your body.
I'm so jealous of your site design, colors, retro feel. Love it.
I'm adopted. I'm thinking maybe it's a good thing I don't know what my birth mom looks like. ;)
Is this a rite of passage like getting your period, buying your first bra, losing your virginitiy?
Mrs. Chicky...I just clicked on your profile via my comments. I didn't know you were a VIRGO! No wonder I like you so much :-)
Signed,
A fellow Virgo.
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