Who is that woman staring back at me from the mirror? She looks familiar, but I can't quite place her. She sort of looks like me, but...
No... It can't be.
Its... My Mother!
[rubbing my eyes]
Okay, that's better. There I am. Blonde hair, hazel eyes. Good smile. Should have worn that retainer a little longer when I was a kid because my teeth are a tiny bit crooked now. But, hey, it gives me character. That's not my Mom after all.
Wait a minute... this woman in front of me has dark circles under her hazel eyes. And there are fine lines at the corners. Her skin is starting to loose some of that youthful glow - and no amount of Jergens Natural Glow facial moisturizer is going to help that cause. There is gray around her hair line. Now I know that can't be me... I just went to the salon on Saturday.
[moving closer to the mirror]
When did this happen? When did I become this woman who looks a lot like the other, older womenfolk in my family? When I looked in the mirror I used to see a 22 year old girl staring back. Now when I look in the mirror I see an adult, a mature woman, a *shudder* grown-up. In a word - my Mom. Never before in my life could I have ever been accused of looking like her. At least not by people who were sober or not under the influence of psychotropic drugs. From the neck up we were completely different - she was dark, I am fair. If not for the fact that she bore me from her womb, most people would never have known that we were even related. So, how - and when - did I become her?
I wonder if it happened so gradually that I just didn't recognize the transformation, or did it happen quickly due to the fact that I am now, myself, a mother. All women know that we will eventually become like our mothers, I guess I just never expected to start looking so much like her. I mean, its not a bad thing to look like a woman who, until her late 40's was often accused of not looking old enough to have adult children... But its still tripping me out. And I don't really know why. I think its an identity thing. I've never, really, looked like anybody in my family. There is not one person in my large collection of relatives that you could point to and say "That one. Your second Aunt on your Mom's side. That's the one you most resemble." I guess I look a bit more like my Dad then anyone else, but only because we both seem to physically carry the Scottish/English genes of our ancestors. There's actually a joke in my family that I was actually the mailman's kid.
Okay, its not a very funny joke, but you need to know my family's humor.
Chicky Baby, though she is beginning to resemble me, is still very much her father's daughter. But she too, one day, will gaze into the mirror and see me staring back at her. I wonder how she will feel about that. I was a lot older, at 32, when I had her then my Mom was when she had me at 20. At what age will she see me staring back at her from the depths of the looking glass?
And, more to the point, will she like it?