Friday, March 03, 2006

...Like the winter needs the spring, you know I need you

My dear husband pointed out to me that I may have come across a little harsh in my last entry about Chicky's playgroup. That was not my intention. I like - No, I NEED that playgroup. By the time Monday rolls around I am counting the hours until Thursday. Its sad, really. I need this time at a toddler playgroup more than my Child. But as a stay at home Mom I don't have a whole lot to look forward to, especially on these long, cold New England winter days.

The reason why I'm tough on this particular group is because this is not the first group that we've attended. When Chicky was about 5 months old I found out about a "New Mommies Group" at the center. There I met 8 other women and their babies who I felt an instant connection with. We were all in that new, glorious and slightly desperate time in our babies lives when we needed to talk with other women who were experiencing the same things. At this YMCA-run center we were given an hour and a half every Friday morning to talk, question, bitch, cry and, ultimately, educate ourselves on our baby's development. We shared stories and bounced ideas off of each other. It was my salvation.

But all good things have to come to an end. The center runs their programs in semesters and the fall/winter semester was ending and it was time to sign up for the winter/spring semester. Two other women and I signed our children up for the Toddler Group, since our kids were a little too far along developmentally to qualify us for the New Mother's Group. The others, since their babies were younger and not yet crawling, stayed together in the first group. We still get together from time to time. I can't wait for the next semester when their kids will be ready to join our group and we can all be back together.

I guess I'm unduly hard on this new group of women because I have not yet found that connection with them. Their children are only slightly older, maybe 6 to 12 months older, tops, but at this age it may as well be a 20 year difference. Chicky is 10 months old and really not ready for a Toddler Playgroup - though she does fantastically and its helping her develop her motor and verbal skills even quicker than she had already been progressing. So, even though I can question the other mothers and get advice on things like sippy cups and walking, we're not quite there yet. Do you know what I mean? Like tends to gravitate towards like. There is one other woman who has a daughter who's 3 weeks older than Chicky and the two of us are getting close. She was not there yesterday and I was lost without her. Sad. So, so, sad.

Before this pity party gets out of control, I want to mention again that I love it when Thursday comes and I have an excuse to get out of the house. A really good excuse. I'm sorry I came across negatively. And if my last entry (and this one, too) taught me anything, it was that I have to make some big steps towards getting to know these women. They are my lifeline, whether they know it or not, and I need them.

Like the flowers need the rain
You know I need them
Guess I'll start it once again
You know I need them
I need them
I need them

*Bonus points for you, Dear Reader, if you know who recorded that song!

No comments: