Tuesday, February 12, 2008

Ew, ew, ew, ew

To the many -many many MANY - people who find this site by searching for Dog P*rn -

Go the hell away. Please and thank you. I know it's my own damn fault for typing those words in the first place but I honestly did not think this many of you had a fetish for da pooches. Wow.

But where I am naive you, dear perverts, are sick.

It's really time to get off your computers and seek help. Like five minutes ago. Really, close your laptops or shut down your PCs and pick up the phone. Call a licensed psychiatrist, have yourself committed, do whatever you need to do to get over this sickness. My sincerest hope is that you haven't acted upon your perverse desire and have stayed in the safety of your parent's basement, away from all innocent four-legged creatures. Believe me, I know dogs. No matter how much you think that French poodle in the tight sweater is asking for it, she's not.

That is all.

--------------

In real dog news...

Still waiting to hear the results of Fisher's latest x-rays and screens. I played phone tag with the vet today so now I have to wait until tomorrow to find out. What's one more day and a few more gray hairs, right?

Thanks for all your concern, your comments and emails have meant a lot to me. They've meant a lot to Fish, too. Since we have deep, meaningful conversations on a regular basis I had to tell him the people in blogland were routing for him. He was really touched.

Like you don't talk to your pets. Psssh.



Fisher wanted to pass on sloppy, stinky kisses to you all. *Smooches*

22 comments:

Stimey said...

Why is it that they look the cutest when you squoosh their faces up like that? My dog does too. Fingers crossed for you.

toddlerplanet said...

Oh, Fisher!

I just said a prayer for your dog. Is that silly? Anyway, it's done.

Ha.

(The dog/lump under the blanket over here says it was a good idea.)

jen said...

oh good lord. it's probably all the Canadians.

(dude, kidding. I love Canadians)

pgoodness said...

I love that squished up face! Hope some good results come soon!

Loralee Choate said...

Great. Now I am not going to be able to watch the finale of The Westminster Dog Show tonight without totally thinking about doggie porn.

Yuck.

Although, maybe the biggest dog show of the year is the catalyst for bringing out the pervs.

(One of my top searches is "Looney Tunes P*rn". While it's not as totally sick, it's still damn disturbing.)

flutter said...

he is so damned cute.

Lara said...

have you SEEN my google-age? there are some DISGUSTING people out in the world, and they all have access to computers. crazy. :-P

motherbumper said...

I will take a screen smooch from that lovely pooch anytime xo lil' guy

Fairly Odd Mother said...

I love that smooshed up face! Cute!!

Blog Antagonist said...

Heh. I hear ya. You know that post I did about same lesbian mothers? That title was really asking for it. Gross.

That is a cute, cute, cute face fer sher.

Velma said...

Hope you get some good news soon!

Ree said...

Smooches right back to Fisher.

Manic Mommy said...

Um, Arf means No?

Yeah, just when you think you've heard it all. Dogs? Really? Ew!

Aimee Greeblemonkey said...

OMG, you should have seen the searches I got when I did a post about the night the neighbor frat b o y s got drunk and decided to sumo w r e s t l e in the middle of the street in t h o n g s.

I wanted to call the internet police.

mo-wo said...

Been thinking about that Fishy Fish a lot today. Count a big get well biscuit to him from us.

creative-type dad said...

Wow.

Well, I guess it's like me getting those 'Cat Vagina' searches from Asia.

Now those are some weird people...

Carmelatte said...

Cutest doggy ever!

Jennifer, Le Binky Bitch said...

There are some sickos out there, aren't there!

Hugs to Fisher.

Jennifer, Le Binky Bitch said...

There are some sickos out there, aren't there!

Hugs to Fisher.

Hannah said...

Um, I'm a cat person but that is one cute puppy you have there.

(Said in a non-disgusting way. Yuck ew gross. I was really happier not knowing about extreme dog fanciers).

Anyway, I hope the news on Fisher is good.

SUEB0B said...

Isn't it kind of exasperating how many freaks there are out there? I write about p33ing my pants one time and every single day I get searched on that...among other things.

Jen M. said...

My ears are bleeding just thinking that there is actually something like dog porn even out there.

Ew ew ew is so right.