Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Freedom!

Don't get too excited - I'm not free from nausea. Nope still have that.

My father-in-law just picked Chicky up for a two and a half day grandparent-fest, leaving me alone (Mr. C is shmoozing techie mucky mucks in L.A. until Friday), with no one else to care for but myself and my dogs until he drops her back off on Friday afternoon.

WAHOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

(*cough* *cough* *retch* *cough*)

Note to self: excitement makes you puke.

Anyhow, what the hell am I going to do with myself for two and a half days? Oh, the possibilities.

Normally if I had this much time to myself (and by "normally" I mean years and years ago before I had a kid) without work obligations or a husband around to dictate how much of our precious free time should be spent at Home Depot I would schlep my tuckus to the mall and shop myself silly while over-caffeinated from too many Starbucks ice vanilla coffees. Or I'd go visit my sister on the Cape and mooch free liquor and food from her restaurant. Or maybe I'd just run around the house, naked and covered with whipped cream and jam, yelling "Bite me! I'm a donut!"

But now that I'm still pretty sick and woozy from weight loss and dehydration I think my days will look more like this:

- Sleep until 10am until whining dogs force me from my warm bed.
- Feed dogs and physically kick them out the door when they realize how cold it is outside and, eh, maybe going outside to take a piss really wasn't worth the whining after all.
- Puke
- Eat some toast and force down a few sips of ice water (the water acting more as a vehicle for my morning Zofran pill than actually being any help in the hydration department).
- Try not to puke.
- Laugh at the dogs from the warmth of my kitchen.
- Puke. (Karma's a bitch)
- Let the dogs in when they begin barking ferociously at the neighbor and make more toast.
- Lay on the couch. Who knew toast could make one so exhausted?
- Sleep, even though just woke up about an hour ago.
- Wake up and consider reading some blogs.
- Puke. (Nothing personal. The puking has nothing to do with your blogs)
- Debate between more toast and tater tots. Tater tots usually win.
- Lay on the couch and eat tater tots. Leave dirty dish on table and threaten dogs to stay away from the leftover ketchup. Then let them lick it clean anyway. It will save a step on the way to the dishwasher.
- Doze off again.
- Wake up, realize there's nothing on television mid-day, try to watch movies on On-Demand and find out that's a fruitless idea since our On-Demand NEVER WORKS ANYWAY. Curse Charter Cable and their shitty cable service. God damn them.
- Consider running to Blockbuster in pajamas.
- Give up that idea and zone out to Shot of Love with Tila Tequila.
- Consider showering because that show makes me feel dirty. Decide to sleep more instead.
- Wake up when the sun goes down. Try to eat more toast.
- Contemplate dog hair tumbleweeds on the floor. Consider getting up to vacuum.
- Puke.

Later, rinse, repeat.

Sounds like fun, doesn't it? I'll tell you, though, being able to do that and not have to worry about getting up to fetch raisins or Gorilla Munch, prepare lunches, change diapers, and fight over who is going to watch whose shows for more than 48 hours sounds like a little bit of heaven to me.

Besides, I never win when it comes to what shows we'll be watching. The only reality show Chicky likes is John and Kate plus Eight.

41 comments:

Wendy said...

I am not pregnant nor puking my guts up, but it sounds like a fun day to me. My GAWD!!! I am that woman, that mom, who would rather be alone and dying than worrying about her kids.

I love them, they are just a lot of work and whining.

Dory said...

Alone time??? Score!!!

Heather said...

Except for the puking part, your plan sounds good to me. Enjoy your "me" days.

http://3boysundermyroof.blogspot.com

Rachel said...

Aside from the puking (been there) sounds nice. Enjoy it!!

Julie Pippert said...

That schedule makes me realize how tired I feel LOL. Therefore, as others have said, aside from the puking part, your plans sound pretty good to me!

Enjoy the break.

Julie
Using My Words

Trenches of Mommyhood said...

RELAX and enjoy. Take care of YOU.

Phoenix said...

Next time you are on the computer, sign up for Netflix....as it will save you the trip to Blockbuster. This is the only offering I have that may help. At least you'll have something to watch. :)

Anne said...

Most non-moms don't understand that just being able to be sick without having to 'serve' others 24 hours a day is a luxury. To be able to just lie there in your misery is heaven! Enjoy your 2.5 days of heaven!

AnotherMomCreation said...

Here's hoping that 2.5 days of rest and less worry will help kick this nausea out the door.

Have a nice rest! Enjoy your time off.

motherbumper said...

You know despite all the puking that sounds like a small slice of heaven to me. Enjoy Mrs. Chicky.

[must resist urge to crack bathing joke - must resist urge to tell you to shower because we can smell you up here joke... must resist]

Lawyer Mama said...

But you get to do all that puking ALONE! Whoooo Hooo!

Heather said...

Bliss! Being sick with no one else to worry about and take care of! Enjoy!

Friso said...

"Or maybe I'd just run around the house, naked and covered with whipped cream and jam, yelling "Bite me! I'm a donut!" ROTFLOL!

Feel better soon and enjoy being sick by yourself. As a mommy I realize being sick and giving into it, isn't an option most of the time.

Blog Antagonist said...

Giiirrrrllllll, you need to stock up on some cheesy '80's movies, chick flicks, and musicals.

Lesseee...cheesy '80's movie: Some Kind of Wonderful (Eric Stoltz, Mary Stuart Masterson, Leah Thompson)

Chick Flick: Fried Green Tomatoes (How can you not love Kathy Bates as Tawanda)

Musical: Hmmmm, that's hard. Either Grease, Meet Me in St. Louis, or The Sound of Music.

Heather B. said...

I am all about the alone time. Alone time is good and needed and if you choose to run around the house naked and/or spend the entire day in bed, then more power to you.

Lara said...

okay, i might lose all your respect here, but i LOVE tila tequila. it rocks something fierce.

also? my blog has only been known to make people puke on very rare occasions.

jen said...

i don't mind puking. i'm heading over.

Mac and Cheese said...

My heaven doesn't include dog hair tumbleweeds or puke, but it still sounds pretty good.

Life As I Know It said...

Enjoy your alone time, even if you are still puking.
Take care of yourself!

Her Bad Mother said...

I would give a lung for some real alone time. Oh, wait, I AM giving up a lung. Something else, then.

ENJOY, my friend. For both of us.

Oh, The Joys said...

There's always Dawson's Creek!

Carol said...

John and Kate Plus Eight is my FAVORITE show!! I totally relate to Kate because... um... because she and I both had 1.) twins and 2.) an abdominoplasty.

I puked and puked and puked with my first. She's 23 now and I STILL remind her what she did to me...

Carol

creative-type dad said...

Now I'm feeling a little wheezy..

Hannah said...

I guess it's an indicator of how tired I am of caring for a toddler, a husband, and a father-in-law day in and day out that your schedule sounds like a blast, even with the puking.

kgirl said...

Hopefully you'll get a similar reprieve later on when you can just lay on the couch and not puke for a couple of days.
But I know exactly how much of an effort getting raisins for someone can be when you feel like ass. So enjoy all you can.

Kyla said...

Sounds really wonderful, actually. Perfect vacation. Minus the puking, of course.

Cakabaker said...

Glad you have the chance to do not a dam thing for a couple of days :)
I might have to try the naked, coolwhip thing :)

mamatulip said...

Enjoy the time alone...

Jennifer aka Binky Bitch said...

Enjoy yourself and puke in peace and quiet.

wayabetty said...

I laughed when I saw the title thinking back to this past Sat. when my sister and I went to Wrentham to shop (KIDS FREE for 8 hours!!) and as soon as I got in the car, I yelled (Mel Gibson's Brave Heart voice) FREEDOM!! I think I left the tire marks on the drive way. ;-)

Hope you'll enjoy some needed R&R Mrs. C!!

Avalon said...

Mrs C~~~ Are you trying to tell me that John and Kate plus Eight should only be enjoyed by toddlers or those rendered helpless and incapacitated by puking and nausea? Is there something wrong with me???

winslow1204 said...

Will keep hoping the nausea will pass quickly!

Kelly said...

So it's not exactly an ideal way to spend some time alone, but still...you can rest in somewhat luxury at not having to find some way to entertain a little girl when all you feel like doing is falling into a deep slumber.

I hope you got some peace.

something blue said...

I'm picturing you acting like a jelly donut! LOL...

I wish I was there to make you toast and let the dogs out. Now you got me wanting Tater Tots but with salsa.

Heather, Queen of Shake-Shake said...

Please, dear crazy puke god way up in the stars, please let Mrs. Chicky have a break from the puking.

Amen.

Lisa said...

Yeay for alone time. Yeay.

Boo on the puking... Boooooo.

But yeay for the alone time. And showers where you can shower in peace and quiet!

Enjoy. Hope the puking stays at a minimum.

kittenpie said...

Alone time is AWESOME. I had alone time yesterday afternoon and had such a nice leisurely shower- toe-painting - dentist visit - shop that I felt like a whole new woman. One who shagged her man instead of passing out at 9 pm. Whoot!

Ruth Dynamite said...

Tila Tequila - such a lovely girl with such darling suitors. Not that I would know anything about it, that is.

I hope you enjoyed your solo dog time and staved off the nausea long enough to watch, oh, The Hills. Soon this nausea will be OVER!!!

mrs. mustard said...

I hugely enjoy Jon and Kate plus 8. It makes me so grateful for what I have and DON'T have!

Fairly Odd Mother said...

Nice to know I'm not the only loser who watches Tia Tequila (and feels dirty afterward). I'm so mad at myself for the time I have lost to that show!

And, good god, you are still puking that much while on the medication? Will you throw up the entire pregnancy, or does it stop at some point?

Rusti said...

I hope you enjoyed your alone-time, sounds like it was a good plan of events for the day.... I hope you're feeling better Mrs. C!