The tortoise and the hare

Early this afternoon, after having lunch with two girlfriends and our three toddlers, we left the restaurant and allowed our kids to walk by our sides out to the cars... As long as they held our hands, of course. The kids (two girls and a boy) decided it was not enough to hold our hands but also needed to hold on to each other. So there we were, three adults and three toddlers, all holding hands in a row as we walked from the restaurant to the parking lot. In our eyes it was a very sweet moment. Such a cute picture we must have made. Up until just a few months ago parallel play was all we got out of our children, this type of interactivity was taking our relationships to a whole other level. It was the type of moment you want to freeze in time. I wanted to anyway.

As anyone with a toddler - or who once had toddlers - knows, kids at this age take their time. The only need to hurry is if the spirit moves them. To say we were taking our time on this day would be like saying Bill Gates is living a comfortable life. Turtles move faster than we were. As we crossed the road to the parking lot we held up a 20-something man in his car from moving around us with our lollygagging. As soon as there was enough room he made a large arch with his car and zoomed around us, but not before he shot me a withering look that only a 25 year old male in a hurry can.

How dare we make him wait?

The Mama Bear in me was not pleased. Not only could one of the kids have picked that very moment to rip his or her hand away and run back towards the restaurant, possibly getting hit by the car, but, Dude, I'm really sorry we held up your day by like 15 seconds. I apologize for inconveniencing you.

No, I'm not sorry at all. Slow down, asshole, you could hurt someone just because you needed your Starbucks fix.

After Speedy Gonzales passed us by one of my girlfriends commented on people never stopping to smell the roses anymore since they're all in a hurry. I thought about that statement on the way home. It's not a new phenomenon. People are always in a hurry. In fact, I was once that person; always rushing off somewhere, impatient with everyone who impeded my progress. But motherhood has forced me to find a patience I never thought I had. For the first time in years I am being forced, sometimes against my will if we're being honest, to stop and enjoy the little things.

Yes, as parents we sometimes have little choice in this matter. Parents, especially stay at home moms and dads, have the luxury of taking everything in. Through our children's eyes we see, for the first time in years, the beauty around us. For instance, do you have any idea how fascinating mailboxes are? Or how about the wonders of fallen tree branches? And when was the last time you laid on the floor and watched a ceiling fan turn? Even if you're a working parent I bet there have been many times when obligation was calling you elsewhere but you took a few minutes to read a picture book or lay on the floor to build a block tower. We take the time because we have to. For our kids.

Now this is not to say that we are never in a hurry to get somewhere. Have you ever tried to get a toddler fed, clothed and out the door to arrive at an appointment on time? It doesn't happen. And parents are not the most observant people in the world. Most of the time we're too caught up in what our kids are doing to look past our little worlds. For instance, the restaurant we visited today is one of those kid-friendly places with lots of 50's and 60's memorabilia on the walls. I've been there a few times but with the exception of the American flag made up of red, white and blue baseballs and the carousel horse I couldn't tell you what else was on those walls. I don't know what's in fashion. Popular music is passing me by and I have no idea what some of my friends are up to. Parenthood has slowed me down so much that my life is now made up of analyzing Sesame Street episodes and finding the right pair of rain boots.

You know, so we can go outside and jump in the puddles.

There are times when I miss my old life with all it's rushing and hurrying and self-importance. But I know that someday I'll be back in the rat race again. So for now I'm going to try to enjoy the feeling of mud through my fingers and taking time to kiss boo-boos and finding just the right band-aid. My hope is that I'll come out the other side a better person for having been both the tortoise and the hare.

Because we all know who came out on top in that story, don't we?