Friday, March 16, 2007

Even my toddler knows what an insufferable bear I can be before my morning coffee

The scene: The kitchen at Chateau de Chicky. It is morning and the Mistress of the house is barely conscious. She sits at the table, listlessly flipping through the latest edition of Bark magazine while her young child sits nearby in her high chair joyfully eating copious amounts of Kix cereal and slices of ripe banana. On the counter the Mistress's morning salvation merrily perks away in the coffee maker.

The coffee maker beeps, signaling its glorious completion.

However, the Mistress does not notice, quickly succumbing to the coma that threatens to fully overtake her.

When...

The Child:
Woffee! Woffee Mama! Done! Mama!!

The Mistress: (rousing) Wah? Huh? What did you say?

The Child: (pointing excitedly at the coffee maker) Woffee Mama. Woffee done!

The Child, not usually given to verbal outbursts instead preferring grunting and screaming, is very pleased with herself as she now points to the cabinet that houses the mugs.

The Child: (pointing to the cabinet) Cup Mama. (then pointing to the coffee maker) Woffee. Cup! Woffee! Mama!

The mistress is now very much awake. She thinks for a moment if she should be concerned that her child knows how important her morning cup of coffee is to the overall sanity of the home. Deciding against being concerned she instead gives her child a huge hug, savoring her child's attempts at forming sentences.

The Mistress: Have I told you today how much I love you?

The Child: (pushing her away) No! Mama stop. Woffee. Go!

The Mistress grabs a cup and pours herself a large serving of the steaming brown liquid. While taking a sip she looks lovingly at her Child over the rim of the mug. They share a knowing smile. All is as it should be and peace settles over Chateau de Chicky.

Scene.


41 comments:

Whirlwind said...

Beautiful and true! Moe usually starts yelling and pointing if I head anywhere in the vacinity of Bakers Dozen (and occasionally, my old stop - DD) as if I NEED to stop everytime I drive by....

She knows her momma well.

Avalon said...

Beautiful scene. I could almost hear the soft, gauzy-music playing as it unfolded. But where's the part when you spill the steaming coffee and get 3rd degree burns??

ECR said...

They're smarter than they look, these little ones.

Velma said...

I love those magical moments when my kids and I are in sync with each other. It's a beautiful thing, and it makes the other 97% of the time we spend together bearable.

metro mama said...

Cakes and McHotty were playing in her room one day while I slept in. When I got up, I stopped by on my way downstairs and she immediately ran to her toy teapot and poured me a coffee. That's my girl!

julia said...

Boo will say "Duntin Donuts, Mama, get a coffee," every time we get in the car. Coffee habit? Me? Ya think?

PunditMom said...

You are raising a wise, wise girl!

Oh, The Joys said...

I wipe a tear from my eye, feeling as though you really UNDERSTAND. It is the same at the house of joy.

Crunchy Carpets said...

It is called 'copee' here..both my kids are learning to make copee for me and know not to bug me before I drink any!

Blog Antagonist said...

Girlfriend, you need a coffee machine with a timer. Husband sets ours every night for 5:30 am, so when I awake at 6:00, the aroma of fresh coffee is already wafting through the air.

This weeks he's been sick, and I have forgotten to do it every. Flipping. Night. So I've had to make coffee, bleary eyed, grouchy, and fumbling at 6:00 am and then WAIT for it to brew.

Torturous. Barbarous. Uncivilized.

Hamilton Beach Brewstation programmable model. It rawks. And so does a husband who remembers to make coffee every night.

Kyla said...

That is my kind of toddler! Very cute!

Rock the Cradle said...

What a perfect way to wake up.
This must have been one of the best moments of the day, because ye GAWDS look at that snow come down!

Think I'll make some hot chocolate...

Amber said...

Sniff. I think I even heard violins playing in the background...

Damselfly said...

She'll either be an excellent barista or a marvelous coach!

Nancy said...

That is TOO funny. Awesome!

Elizabeth said...

It's times like that when we realize that our children are soaking up a LOT more information than we thought!
What a cutie pie she is.

jen said...

Amen. that is adorable. the knowing.

NKYGAL said...

OMG. I love it. I too cannot function with out my delicious cup of joe. I set it up to go before I go to bed and it is the first thing I head for when I pull my self (internally kicking and screaming) from out of my bed.

Shannan
MommyBits.blogspot.com

petite gourmand said...

sounds like a scene from our morning..
no coffee=no function.

Kevin Charnas said...

HHAA!! So cute...and SO wise.

I'm with you, my sister from another mister, if the world runs out of coffee I'm heading to the nearest bridge. And it better be high.

creative-type dad said...

Wow! Mine isn't trained like that quite yet.

Sandra said...

Love it!

Clearly a brilliantly trained child :)

Pendullum said...

Why is it my husband of 17 years could use some Baby Chicky training???

Jill Urbane, The Mentor Mom said...

Great post! It certainly exemplifies how in tune our kids are with us even at such a young age. What special moment. Thanks for sharing it with the rest of us :)

Fairly Odd Mother said...

Ahhhh, coffee! My favorite vice.
"Woffee" is the best!

flutter said...

ahhhh how cute! My fiance looks at me the same way.

Cmommy said...

I'm adding you to my Morning Coffee because this post is brilliant! I'm so glad I found your blog! :-)

Sara said...

LOL! Been right there with you, minus chickybaby. My coffee machine has hot water in a resevoir so there is NO wait time! Heaven...

Jill said...

LOL, I love that child.

Shoshana said...

Awww, I love the first time a child figures out the power of words. Just beautiful!

Surviving Motherhood said...

Very very impressed with your baby training abilities! Wow.

SJ said...

Mmmm, coffee. A child knows her mamma - how sweet :)

Have a great weekend!

Redneck Mommy said...

I don't know whether to be scared for her or proud of her....

A little of both is called for, I'm sure...

Tinkleberry said...

a very wise baby indeed. I wish mine was trained like that...I think she still has some ways to go

Jenny said...

Better than Hailey telling me I need a margarita.

Lawyer Mama said...

Chicky is clearly wise for her age.

My 2 year old knows where every Starbucks in a 10 mile radius is and becomes very alarmed if I pass one without stopping. "Stop, Mommy, STOP!" And my 14 month old alread knows how to say coffee. Does this mean I have a caffeine problem?

Mich said...

Woffee is vunderFuel!

Janet a.k.a. "Wonder Mom" said...

You have trained her well.

Good job!

My kid and I have "cafe" every morning together. Mine the strong stuff hers, the chocolate milk in a kiddie coffee cup!

Tabba said...

I knew it was a bad sign when I pulled up to Dunkin' Donuts & my (then) 3 year old son yelled into the drive-thru speaker:

MEDIUM DECAF. EXTWA CWEAM. TWO SUGAW'S.
THANKS.

They do get how important coffee is at a really early age, don't they??

Mrs. Chicken said...

The Poo and Chicky Baby should get together to make us coffee.

My girl does the same thing, only see says, "coppee, mommy! want some coppee?"

Ruth Dynamite said...

She's a genius child. Smart and cute!