Always look for the silver lining (around the ring of the toilet seat)

Pukefest '07 seems to be over, thank you jeebus. And thank you all for the kind words and the comments from those of you who have been through something like this. I'm still not one hundred percent positive that it was food poisoning - and I'm certainly not 100% back to my old self - but I don't know what else could so forcibly rip one's guts out through their throat, leaving one a lifeless pile of skin on the bathroom floor.

Every experience is a learning experience and for every crappy thing that happens to me at least I get a good story out of it. I have to admit, in real life I'm a bit of a black cloud (stop snickering, husband of mine) but on this blog I tend to come across as the freaking blue bird of happiness in comparison. So why not combine the two in regards to my recent date with the porcelain goddess? I'll be the happy little bird... who shits on your head.

The Pro's and Con's of having Food Poisoning

Con: Abandoning the perfectly good glass of wine that was just poured because stomach is feeling queasy.
Pro: Stopping at just a few sips, so there's no hangover!
Con: Think again. The next morning it still feels like you drank two jugs of Boone's Farm.
Pro: Who knew vomit could be so vibrantly colored. It lends interest to an otherwise horrible experience.

Con: You puke up an entire day's worth of food in one five hour period. The next day it hurts your stomach to eat one piece of toast. It'll be a few days before you can eat a decent meal and a few weeks before you can make oatmeal for your kid.
Pro: You drop a few pounds and your jeans fit great!

Con: You become intimate with your toilet.
Pro: Once you can stand the sight of it, you will be forced to stop procrastinating and will have to blast clean your entire bathroom. (Don't ask. It's not a pretty story.)

Con: You find out the hard way that since having a child... well, one word - Incontinent.
Pro: At least you didn't have to remove your head from the toilet seat.

Con: Having to "sleep", and I use that term loosely, on the bathroom floor inches from a nasty john.
Pro: Aw hell, I got nothin'. I'm still recovering from losing an entire night's worth of sleep.

Pro: After spending the night on the bathroom floor you get to spend the next day in bed or on the couch watching your Tivo'd episode of "America's Next Top Model" hurling insults at the 20-something with the impossibly flat stomach who had a baby just seven months prior.
Con: Your toddler, who has never seen you sick or resting for that long in one place will become incredibly agitated and demand that you get up by forcibly removing your blanket and then try to pull you from the couch by your toes.
Pro: She'll learn some colorful language from you screaming obscenities at the ridiculously thin 20-something mommy model.
Con: She'll learn some colorful language which she'll probably use on her parents one day.

-----------------------------------

Onto the links.

- Blogger has not let me comment for the past two days. It's truly amazing how many entries you get when you Google "Blogger Sucks". So if you've "seen" me around and wondered why I haven't commented, that's the reason. Blogger sucks. There's one more for Google.

But seriously, is anyone else having this problem? I go to comment and the stupid visual verification isn't there. Oh, it says "visual verification" but it's in the place of the jumbled letters that I need to type in to have my comment saved. Turn off the visual verification on your blogs, 'kay? Yep, just for me.

- Was I happy that "The Departed" won the Oscar for Best Picture? Fuck yeah. The nuns at my elementary school would be so proud of this link. (Best not to watch it at work or with the wee ones around, because this is a bit like last week's Oscar iFilm.)

- More proof that Hollywood will take something that's fairly humorous and novel and beat it into the ground so that you never want to see it again.

- Finally! Dancing with the Stars just got interesting. Big Pussy is out, Cliff Clavin is in.

- At least these poor people were given the option of digging up their pets before the condos went up. That's gotta count for something.

- Since I'm still recovering from this week (Did I need to get sick on the same week as the anniversary of my mother's death? No. Does it surprise me that this happened? No. Am I scared for next year. Yeeesss.) I'm going to include a recipe, yes a recipe, on this week's list o' links. This has quickly become one of Mr. C's favorites. I think mainly because it's one of the five things I'll prepare for dinner. With one of the five being cold cereal.

He comes home from work yelling "Meat pie!" which I suppose it is, although it's really called Spiced Beef Corn Bread Cobbler. It's super easy, a little different due to all the spices, and thoroughly satisfying. Try it, you'll like it. Unless you're a vegetarian. Or a communist.

Enjoy!