Tuesday, April 25, 2006

Cautiously Optimistic

A quick note regarding yesterday's post:
Thank you all for your kind words regarding yesterday's ramblings (oh, I did rattle on, so I doubly thank you) . Yesterday's entry filled a very personal need for self-reflection. However, if you decided to take a moment to thank God, Allah, Colonel Sanders, Snuggle the Fabric Softener Bear, or your 82 year old neighbor for your good fortune... Great. If, instead, you decided to bitch and moan and gripe about things in general... Fantastic! As Moms, women, people we are allowed to do that whenever the occasion calls for it. For me, yesterday was not that occasion. But let me assure you, dear reader, that there will be much bitching to come on this Mama's blog. Oh yes. There will be bitching.

But not today.

Today I am sanguine (love that word!), hopeful, optimistic. Cautious, but optimistic nonetheless. Chicky Baby seems to have reached a certain type of milestone. I hate to even mention it aloud. The superstitious side of me is screaming "I need a block of cherry or maple to rap my knuckles on - STAT! A pine 2x4?! It will have to do." But, in keeping with my new quest for positivity (and if you knew me you would find this whole optimistic thing quite funny) I believe I might be celebrating soon by putting away the nursing bras and taking a trip to Vicky's Secret because...

I think I might have finally weaned Chicky Baby!

waiting for the bolt of lightning

Her birthday was the last day that she nursed. The next day, out of frustration from the complete lack of any tangible nourishment, she pushed me away and she hasn't tried to burrow her way under my shirt since. Had I known last Monday was going to be the last time I'm sure I would have taken a moment while she was nursing to reflect on our long, often times frustrating, journey together. But its just as well I didn't know. No use crying over dried up milk, right?

I've been gradually weaning her, so I'm not suffering from any pain. What I am suffering from is that lack of quiet time with my baby girl. We still have our cuddle time when she sits on my lap and snuggles in with her bottle of milk but its not quite the same. If you would have told me this time last year that I would have 1) Made it one whole year nursing my daughter and 2) Pined for that part of Motherhood in my quiet time I would have told you to go play in traffic. But pining I am, just a little. I know I'll get over that feeling of missing something in time and I think I know what might help me...

Sexy lingerie! WooHoo!

Any suggestions?


27 comments:

Julie Marsh said...

Congrats to you both!

Neither of my girls nursed very long. Both gave it up voluntarily by about five months. While I hated the bras and hated the pump, I loved the convenience and loved the snuggling.

Anonymous said...

I'm one of those nuts that loved breastfeeding, and was sad when it was over. It was a great bonding time.

That said, I do remember the first time we fed my oldest daughter her first feeding of cereal, and the joy and elation I felt as I handed my husband the spoon and said, "Ahhh, YOU can feed her!"

Chaotic Mom said...

Suggestions? Be careful with the sexy lingerie AND stopping breast feeding at the same time. Make sure you either WANT more kids or are taking other precautions to NOT have other kids at the same time. I speak from experience...

Christina said...

Hooray! Congratulations on making it a full year! I really wanted to nurse Cordy for a full year, but we didn't get past 4 months due to a number of factors.

Go check out the new VS bra that doesn't have any tags - it's very comfy! And get something frilly and red or black as well.

Heather Bea said...

I loved being able to toss the nursing bras and go shopping, but I found it a little depressing at the same time., different size things didn't quite look the same in the boob department. I just loved being able to wear real underwire bras again.

Congrats on the weaning and understanding that it is a little bittersweet. A whole year is so great and she has gained so much from it.

Anonymous said...

This is the bittersweet aspect of motherhood - we're supposed to bond AND then to let them go and this if we really do love them, it can be painful...It's obvious you are a warm and loving Mom. Try to think of this transition as only the beginning of the wonderful relationship you will have with your daughter. Just enjoy each stage

Sandra said...

My son nursed to his first birthday too. I expected a realllllly long weaning process but like Chicky baby he got frustrated with the short supply and said 'nuf of this! I had planned to keep his night nurse for as long as he wanted because I liked that quite time together.

BUT I had a ritual ceremony where I packed up all the ugly nursing bras and hit the Victoria Secret Website for something in every colour. Woo Hoo!

Congrats you sanguine woman you :)

Chicky Chicky Baby said...

MG - Ahh, the snuggling. pout

SPM - You're not nuts. I loved nursing... After the fifth month!

CM - Oh, man! I didn't even think of that. How about some not-so-sexy lingerie? :)

Christina - Thanks for the suggestion. I'm going to check them out.

Heather J - Unfortunately, things aren't quite where they were before I got pregnant. But I'm hoping through the miracle of undergarment technology I'll be able to fake it.

Mamacita - Thank you for those inspiration words!

SS - That's what I was planning on, too! Things never work out the way you plan them.

ms blue said...

Chicky Baby has magically turned into Chicky Toddler! Technically she has another 6 months of being a baby but she sounds like such a big girl now.

I never had any luck with breastfeeding and despised pumping but I did the best I could. I always knew that I was missing what you described so eloquently.

Chicky said...

I lasted maybe 3 months with both boys (3 and 10months), and it was a total love/hate thing for me. I wished I could keep up with demand, and I was so glad to be done with it. I pumped for the first 10 weeks with both since they were both in the NICU (13 and 10 weeks premature)- my supply just couldn't keep up that long, and once they came home, it disappeared all together. But I'm glad I could do it for them when they were at their most fragile, and the benefits are well worth it. Kudos, mama.

Anonymous said...

Congratulations to you! I never got to nurse because MJ figured (I guess) that since my boob was bigger than her head at that point, there was NO WAY!

I do miss that snuggle time though, even if it was with a bottle :(

mo-wo said...

Ah honey I guess you don't face it like me.. I saw weaning as the end to a decent bra size.

My solution, #2 expected this July. CM is right, look out!

Bobita said...

My daughter pulled a 14-month tour of duty at the boob...neither of the boys came close (1st boy: 6 mos and baby boy: 3 mos). It was so bittersweet, because of that special quiet time together!!

But by baby #3...as soon as he rejected any visits to boob-central...I think I actually did backflips!

After about 5 years...my joy came from the fact that my body belonged to me. Just me.

Yep. Bittersweet.

Kristin said...

it is the dream weaning!

Mom101 said...

Wanna seriously do it up in the sexy underthangs department? Look up Agent Provacateur. I'd write it up on Cool Mom Picks but I think we'd lose all our readers...

The Domesticator said...

A great lingerie site? OK, my husband found this one:Trashy.com
Great name, huh?
Oh, I even bought a few things...
Congrats on the weaning!

Mama C-ta said...

No tips on lingerie as mine all have flaps that fold down and milk stains still. But congrats on the weaning. I havne't been able to read your entire weaning journey but it sounds like Chicky Baby is the one that finally ended it and that is always best. Nursing has been pretty much hell for us too but I know I will miss it terribly so I feel for you.

Anonymous said...

Congratulations!

Say goodbye to the nursing bra, and hello to everything lacey and slinky!

Carolyn S. said...

Ava's 1st birthday marked the last day nursing as well. Congrats on making it a year. Treat yourself to something lacy.

Her Bad Mother said...

This is the second blog of the day where I am just dittoing Mom-101 (who, clearly, I am just following around, maybe stalking, but in a nice way, you know?) - splurge on some Agent Provocateur. You'll feel nast-aaay, but in a good way. High-end trashy. The best.

And? Congrats!

(And, and? Missed your last post. So sorry that things were going rough. But, now, lingerie!)

MrsFortune said...

I say go the Frederic's of Hollywood route. Why hold back? You sanguine woman, you. Excellent word.

Cristina said...

how exciting to get back to the sexy lingerie. I myself am still in a JC Penny's nursing bra so for now I will live vicariously through you.

P.S. Way to go on bf for a year. awesome.

tracey clark said...

aaaawww, that reminds me of weaning my girls and the few days that followed and how I missed it too. It is strange how with each milestone we lose a little bit of our heart. Waaaaah!

OK, now get out there and get sexy with it! WoOHOO!

GIRL'S GONE CHILD said...

Wow! Congrats to you!!!!!! Sexy lingerie? Um... I'm still wearing my nursing bras because they're comfortable but for you i'm thinking lace, satin and/or maybe some leather? hee.

owlhaven said...

I'm the same way-- wishing I KNEW that was the last ime so I can really savor it.
Mary, mom to many

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