Wednesday, February 25, 2009

What do you mean, acid washed jeans aren't in style anymore?

I used to love to shop.

Back in the day my mother, sister and I would drive hours out of our way to pray at the altar of consumerism - or The Mall - all in the pursuit of fabric to cover our bodies. We'd make a whole day of it. We were warriors, Olympic athletes in the sport of competitive shopping. Endurance and stamina were key. Small waists and skinny legs helped too.

Just thinking about it now exhausts me.

These days you'd have to pay me to enter a mall to shop for myself. I'll happily shop for my girls but when it comes to purchasing clothing for myself I'll do a fly by of the women's section at Target or just wait for the clothes I already own to disintegrate off my body. Which is why my closet looks like the sales rack at the Goodwill. It takes a really special occasion to force me to enter the dressing room of someplace like Banana Republic - or the threat of public nakedness. Which ever comes first.

Maybe it's because my mom is no longer around so I don't have that familiar partner in crime to accompany me, the one who will tell me truthfully if a pair of pants does nothing for my ass. Maybe it's this new body of mine; the one that has borne two children and is more womanly, with hips and, unfortunately, thighs. I don't know how to dress it anymore. Clothes I normally wouldn't think twice about buying straight from the rack look all wrong on me now. The woman in the mirror is alien. Where is the waif I once knew? Where, dammit, where?

(Probably hiding in the closet with the moths and the ghosts of the 90's drowning her sorrow in cookies, which is how she got in this mess to begin with. Also sex. The babies didn't come from copious cookie consumption. Just a little heads up from your friends at Chick Chicky Baby.)

And the prices. Don't even get me started on the prices. It's enough to make the cheap grandmother in me run home to rub my nickels together.

I've also gotten a little... What's the word? Comfortable? Complacent? Boring. Yeah, that's it. I've gotten boring. You would fall asleep after just one look at me, if you could find me under all the drab browns and blacks I own. Which you couldn't, because that's a lot of drab.

It started when I left my corporate job for the world of dogs. There was little room for dress pants among the rows of denim in various stages of wear and tear in my closet. Pretty sweaters were pushed aside for sweatshirts and polartec and anything that required ironing was banished to the back to make way for the avalanche of t-shirts I wore day in and day out. I don't think even Stacy and Clinton would want to take me on.

(The way I worded that last sentence made me kinda hot. A What Not to Wear threesome. I bet they do it on cashmere. I know I would.

Where was I?)

I don't work with dogs as frequently as I used to but I do have little kids who throw up on my regularly and like wiping peanut butter covered cheeks on my pants so my wardrobe hasn't changed all that much. Dog poop, baby poop - it's all the same. (No, not really.) Anyone with any fashion sense would take one look at me on any given day and immediately take pity. My fetish for baseball hats alone would be enough to induct me into the Fashion Hall of Shame, if there was such a thing.

There's isn't, right? I was just kidding about that. Don't call the fashion police on me please. I wouldn't have the bail money.

But last weekend I had a tiny, ever-so-insignificant breakdown of sorts. My husband and I were going on a rare date and I had nothing to wear. And I'm not joking about that, there was quite literally nothing. There were plenty of ten year old wool sweaters with holes in them, shirts stained with different types of body fluid, and pants that pushed my muffin top up and out for all the world to see, but nothing date worthy. When I alerted Mr. C to this he scoffed. Until I put him before my clothes and told him to pick something, anything date appropriate and I would wear it AND HE COULDN'T FIND ANYTHING EITHER.

Take that, suckah. Now hand over the credit card.

So last night I had my credit card, I had my glass of wine and I had my laptop. I was ready to shop.

Five hours and a lump on my forehead from banging my head repeatedly with my computer later and I still hadn't purchased a single thing. I even asked the folks on Twitter where I should shop.

(I love the people in the computer. Without them I wouldn't be able to wipe my own ass.)

After the wine had gone to my head I impulsively clicked on some items that didn't scare me too much and offered them my credit card number. I think I promised them a kidney too. Clothes are expensive, y'all, and I am cheap.

Now I wait for the nice FedEx man to ring my bell and hand me his my package. If it doesn't fit or flatter it will be a huge pain in the tuckus to return everything but at least I don't have to parade my thighs out into the fluorescent-lit dressing room for some 90 pound sales girl named Kimmy to evaluate my fashion choices. I hate those girls. They're so perky.

But as bad as this experience was, it is nothing compared to what I will go through to find something suitable to wear to Blogher this year. I should videotape that because it should make for some choice blog fodder. Or maybe someone will take pity on me and offer to dress me.

272 comments:

1 – 200 of 272   Newer›   Newest»
Goddess in Progress said...

Ugh, the same thing happened to me. My husband wanted to take me to a nice restaurant for my birthday, and I had to tell him we couldn't because I had literally nothing to wear. I have jeans. I have t-shirts. I have 18-month-olds. That's it.

I did get a couple of slightly nicer shirts and a pair of pants that aren't made of denim, but it's not exactly a wardrobe. But my motivation is so low! SAHM? Please! What do I need besides jeans? And shorts when it gets warm?

I was never a fashionista, by any stretch, but now it's just kind of sad. Alas.

PS~Erin said...

Okay, you are cracking me up. I am over here giggling outloud and my little babe is fussing to get out of his crib. Funny stuff (and I can totally relate to so much of it)! Thanks for sharing it all!!

Emily said...

After living in London I have had various fashion mantras beaten into me and can often imagine the head of another me rotating around exorcist style as I leave the house in a fleece and yoga pants (oh the shame).

On saturday I slipped into a dress and heels to head out for dinner and I realised something shocking. I felt GOOD making an effort and I felt like myself again. I need to keep that in my head that as much as it can be exhausting to make the effort it brings me back to myself. Maybe new clothes will bring you closer to your happy?

Jenn@mylifewiththecrazies said...

I feel your pain! Its so hard finding nice stuff that says ... mommy, wife, comfort... without being too revealing! I have a smaller waist and a large chest... dont get me started on shirts... ughh... Kohls and Target are my best friends!

Sarah @ BecomingSarah.com said...

I loved the interjection about how copious cookie-eating didn't create the children lol.

Also, why doesn't the in-front-of-the-closet approach work with my husband? He'll say "okay, we'll stay in then and you go naked."

Sigh.

Jessica said...

Ahhh, those moments are awful, aren't they? I have them regularly now. You'd never know that I was awarded Best Dressed during my collegiate years, though I can still spot trends waaay ahead of the curve. LOL.

You are definitely not alone (unfortunately).

Domestic Extraordinaire said...

I have GREAT news for you. Yesterday when I was in Target I saw a whole rack of acid washed jeans.

I know, I about fell over myself. I thought to take a photo of them after I was on my way home. And I call myself a photographer.

Can't wait to hear about your new duds.

Samtastic said...

I hear ya, girlfriend. Shopping sucks.

I shop at Old Navy. Easy on the wallet, and very, very basic. Sometimes, fancy but always always easy peasy.

Dr. Liz said...

Most online stores 'conveniently' give you a prepaid return label (usually costs you $6 or so to ship stuff back) to send back the stuff you don't like/doesn't fit. And if you call UPS and schedule an appointment for them to pick up the package, you don't even have to leave the house. (Trust me, I'm a pro at this!) I don't think I've set foot in a bricks-and-mortar store in years.

Mel said...

Long-time reader, first-time commenter. By the way, you are hilarious.

I will dress you if you will dress me... I love taking my sister-in-law shopping (she's still in college and needs some gentle direction with things that flatter her body and don't look... ahem... for sale).

I can't go shopping without taking someone with me. A few months after giving birth to my son, I made the mistake of going bathing suit shopping alone with the baby. I cried, he cried, it was not pretty.

I'm pretty fortunate in the fact that my dad works at Kohl's. And my mom loves to shop. My dad watches my now toddler while us girls go shopping, and then he comes in with his employee discount. Awesome sauce.

mothergoosemouse said...

Just today, I wiped mushed bananas off of Oliver, which of course ended up on me too, and I looked down at my outfit, which is really quite a grand term for the scrubby clothes that were hanging off me, and thought of what Stacy and Clinton would say.

And then I imagined telling them to f*** off, because I will continue to wear this crap until all my kids have outgrown the propensity to smear mushed bananas on me.

So. No advice here.

margalit said...

Closet Exchange in Needham is having an 80% off sale in all three stores starting THursday and lasting thru Sunday. If you're not familiar with stores, they are all resale shops owned by same woman. One is TOP designer, one is mall designer, one is kinda regular old sweaters stuff. The TOP designer stuff is AMAZING and at 80% off, almost free.

Try it.

Cate said...

Oh, I identify with this so much. I realized earlier that all the clothes I'm wearing today have holes in them. And I do care, but not quite enough to do anything about it.

Please report back with your results. Where did you order from?

Avalon said...

Now you've gone and made me ashamed of my acid washed jeans. I thought everyone else loved me in them.Isn't that why they all grin so cheerfully at me whenever I wear them to work with my Capezios, leg warmers and headband?

Mac and Cheese said...

I saw acid wash in a store window this week too! You're good to go!

Fairly Odd Mother said...

If Old Navy didn't make Tall Jeans, I'd be naked from the waist down.

I think we should have a Mass Mamas pre-BlogHer shopping trip. Just thinking about that event makes me a little woozy.

I'd offer to host a clothing swap that I've heard some mom-groups do, but I have nothing anyone would ever want. And, if all else fails, you can come to my sister's house with me----I raid her closet for cool jewelry, tops, dresses, etc all the time.

carrie said...

No way, please tell me that acid wash is not coming back. Please?

And yes, former shopping hater here too - and then I discovered The Gap outlet. It was as if I'd been blindfolded every time I'd been in there before. Or maybe it was too crowded that I couldn't see the cute mom clothes and just went straight to the kids section? Whatever it is, it is working for me, and I have a feeling you'll get your shopping mojo back soon!

Heather said...

Clothes shopping is a form of torture.

Working Mom said...

I too follow the disintegration route. I'm either too thick-hipped and too pudgy-stomached (what a c-section will do for your abs!), too short-legged, too well-endowed, or too cheap for most of the stuff I can find on the racks at the local haunts (TJ Maxx, Marshall's, Target). Wouldn't it be nice to have these stores have folks that would put together a wardrobe for someone on a budget?!?

P.S. - How long can I work the "I just had a baby" weight excuse (he's almost 13 months now)?

Kristina said...

It certainly doesn't help that I'm eating a piece of cheesecake while I read these comments and none of my pre-baby cute clothes fit yet. And even those aren't so stylish (more Ann Taylor loft sales rack in the back than Banana Republic or Nordstrom). And I only wrote Nordstrom to sound kind of with-it. I rarely buy anything there because it's too expensive.

I second, or third, the vote for Old Navy. That's where I get most of my mom clothes. But I think their shorts, capris, t-shirts are pretty cute and the price is right (although, I gather items in my shopping cart and wait for them to go on sale and wait for a 20% off coupon....).

So I guess I'm a bit pudgy, definitely cheap, and don't have much fashion style.... Yippee

Designher Momma said...

shopping. gage me with a spoon.

Christina said...

I just threw out some clothes from my college days, realizing I will never be able to wear them again, so I should stop hoping.

But clothes shopping? I hate it now. It's always depressing, because nothing fits well anymore.

Amber said...

Oh, and don't even get me started on the lighting in change rooms. It's like rubbing salt in the wound, honestly. I've already braved the mall, and the line-up for the change room, and now you're going to make me look worse than I already do?

Which is why I am still wearing maternity underwear. From my first pregnancy. More than four years ago.

courtney said...

Oh, I so understand. I am in desperate need of a new pair of jeans - one that doesn't have holes or a saggy ass, but I can't bring myself to do it because shopping for denim is the bane of my existence. I carry all of my weight in my gut so nothing fits right! Boo!

Andi said...

This post is hilarious! I wandered over here from Five Star Friday and started reading around. I have to say I NEED to know where the shoes in your blog header came from - I MUST have them!

Amo said...

Okay, so a kid-less friend decided to empart a little nugget of wisdom on me last week. Apparently, zappos has free shipping and returns. (They carry clothes now too...who knew?!)

Not that I have the nerve to shop at all with this 'where-the-hell-did-that-dimple/pucker/flab-come-from' body.

I am trying to convince myself that I can get away with wearing the same clothes I wore to Blissdom to BlogHer. No one will remember, right?!

-as I sit here typing in my hubs sweatshirt and acid-washed jeans. Sad part? I actually left the house today too...

What the hell has happened to us all?! (And where the hell are the cookies?! I need comfort now.)

kittenpie said...

What?! You can't shop without trying on! God, I wish I lived closer and I would so take you out shopping. I would tell you honestly but kindly if something was not flattering, make you try on stuff you wouldn't pick but might just work, and make you keep going. Because you? Are lovely, and totally deserve to look at hot as you did at last BlogHer.

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