Friday, January 12, 2007

A three hankie, at least

**Edited! Because I am a dolt. A super sized dolt. And others have reminded me of that fact so I must rectify the situation.**

I am a sap. A weepy, sniveling, teary pile of snot and sentiment. I break down while watching Pampers commercials and I'll turn on the water works if I so much as catch a sweet, private moment between my husband and my child - like when he takes her for a walk down the street and I see the two of them walking hand in hand, and Chicky is looking up at him babbling something incoherently and he's pretending he understands every word and oh lord it hits me right in the gut, gaaahhhh....

I'm sorry, I need a minute.

All this blubbering, however, is done mainly in private. You will never see me cry, and neither will most of my family or my friends, because that is just not done. Shed tears in public? Psssh. Are you kidding me? Show me a wounded puppy, a lost child, a missed 50% off sale at my favorite clothing store, and I will show you stoicism and a level head. You may call me insensitive (which is just not the case, because as soon as you're out of sight - Tears. Lots of them, as mentioned above.) but I call it tough. Yeah, tough as nails, tough as steel, tough as the last steak I cooked.

There are a few things that will turn my icy heart to mush in the company of others, however. A newly opened bottle of good wine that an errant hand sends crashing to the floor, for instance. That will cause me to shed a tear or two. A post that I spent all day working on that magically disappears when I hit the Save as Draft button will also cause me to bawl. Not necessarily because of the lost post but because in my fury I probably kicked something with my bare foot. And the one surefire thing that will make me yowl like a lost kitten - Music. Sappy, sentimental music. These days any music written about children and parents will make me cry harder than that scene in Beaches when Bette and Barbara Hershey are at the beach and Wind Beneath My Wings starts to play and did you ever know that you're my hero? and she dies oh my lord she dies and the tears the tears the tears that stupid song I hate that song and it gets me every time I see that movie the tears the tears...

(hey, I'm having a private moment here. Do you mind? Keep your finger pointing and laughing to yourself.)

I'd like to say that this started happening after I became a mother but, no, I was a puddle of goo when I first heard "Butterfly Kisses" ten years ago. And yes, that hurts to admit. I know that by admitting that the ol' credibility-o-meter just plummeted through the floor, but it was right before my (first) wedding and I was already an emotional wreck because I knew I was making a horrible mistake but it was about a father and his daughter and growing up and growing apart and...

(I said stop laughing. It's not that funny.)

Since becoming a mother I have reached a new level of sap-titude. If the song is about a child, or can be attributed to a parent/child relationship, and it hits close to home I will cry like a pregnant bride left at the altar. I feel safe telling you this, my friends, because I know I'm not alone. I can't be the only one who feels this way when I hear "You are my Sunshine". There must be others out there like me.


No? I'm the only hormonal mess with a craptacular taste in music? Yeah, thought so.


Because I love to spread mirth and merriment where ever I go, along with sunshine, rainbows, and puppies - and because I know there are others out there with this same problem - I've compiled a list of my favorite songs so that you too can weep in your bowl of corn flakes. Together we will weep in parental solidarity, and if you are not a parent there's a good chance you have a parent or two whose image you will conjure up while listening to these tunes. In the spirit of weepiness I give you...

Mrs. C's list of songs about children and parents that will make you run for your box of Kleenex or will at least put enough of a dent in your icy cold veneer to make you crack a smile, you hardass you.
(ooh, catchy title. K-tel records is going to be sorry they missed that one.)

Slumber My Darling - Allison Krauss, Edgar Meyer, Mark O'Connor & Yo Yo Ma
Still Fighting It - Ben Folds (Son or daughter, I dare you to not cry when listening to this. Go ahead. I. Dare. You.)
Gracie - Ben Folds (Damn you, Ben Folds, and your sensitive lyrics! Damn you.)
I Will Take You Home - Grateful Dead
Lullabye - Jack Johnson & Matt Costa
We are Going to be Friends - White Stripes
Have a Little Faith in Me - John Hiatt
Dad Caught Stars - Justin Roberts
To Zion - Lauryn Hill
Love and Happiness - Mark Knopfler and Emmylou Harris
Forever Young - Bob Dylan
Sunrise, Sunset - (just wanted to see if you were still paying attention)
Child of Mine - Carole King
Lullabye (Goodnight, My Angel) - Billy Joel
My One True Friend - Bette Midler
Lullaby Baby Blues - Keb' Mo'

**And because I can't let this opportunity go by...

Father and Daughter - Paul Simon (like a postcard of a Golden Retriever? How could I have forgotten this song? Thanks Kristen.)
Daughters - John Mayer (thanks for reminding me Casey. Duh.)
Dream a Little Dream of Me - Cass Elliott (one of my all time favorites. Ever. And I forgot it while compiling the original list. I am a loser.)

There you go. Enjoy a good whimper. Now tell me, lambs, what would you add?


Nichole said...

My Little Girl by Tim McGraw...(sobs)

Amie Adams said...

Okay, I totally feel out of it because I don't know most of those songs, though I completely agree with the Billy Joel song.

O Holy Night (it's sort of about a kid and his parents right?) All of the sudden started getting to me as soon as I had kids (I don't really go to church). You know how embarrassing it is to shed tears at the Christmas Eve services in front of your in-laws?! The same inlaws who go to church every week and are sure their son isn't going because of you. It's not pretty.

Anonymous said...

100 Years by Five for Fighting gets me because we used that song in a video of my daughter's first year.

I must have been a Chicky Baby in a past life, because when my first daughter was born I wept like Richard Simmons getting waxed and I haven't stopped since.

Anonymous said...

What the?
Are you trying to reduce me to a pile of snot? It's working....

You don't even want to hear my 'Wind Beneath My Wings' story....To this day, I still can't hear that song. Just has to do with my mother. Ok.

And the spilled wine. Oh god. You totally are hitting it all on the very same pitiful head.

Nuff said.

Radioactive Tori said...

Why do you insist on making me cry? I am already in a sappy sort of mood, and this just pushed me over the top. I'm going to get some tissue now.

Tug said...

is it "I Try" by Macy Gray? It was playing when my daughter & son-in-law took the 9 month old grandson I'd seen EVERY.DAY. since I was at his BIRTH and moved 1500 miles away...

Forever Young by Rod Stewart - I did a slideshow of the daughter, son-in-law & grandson since their births & set it to that song. We ALL cry...

Found you through SparkyDuck maybe? Love the blog!!

Tug said...

oh yeah - The Dance by Garth Brooks always gets me too. I'm done now...

Irreverent Antisocial Intellectual said...

GC sane "The Lion Sleeps Tonight" the other night in perfect tune and my SWAT husband teared up ... which made me tear up ... which made the kid laugh at us.

I know none of your sappy tunes - thanks goodness. I hate to cry.

Anonymous said...

Have you heard Heartland's "I Loved Her First?" Ohmigod. Its a daddy singing about his daughter getting married and it makes me baaaaaaawwwwwwl like a baby.

Anonymous said...

Oh, and one more..."Alyssa Lies" by Jason Michael Carroll. Tear jerker.

Lara said...

i've always been partial to "baby mine" from "dumbo". also "anna rose" and "lullabye for a stormy night" by vienna teng, and "godspeed" by the dixie chicks. oh man, such good songs.

joker the lurcher said...

how about the one which has the line "if you get the chance to sit it out or dance - i hope you dance" not sure who its by but it always make s me cry in the car!

OhTheJoys said...

Sheeeeeeeee-it. I'll even cry to "Parents are People" from the Free to Be You and Me album. How LAME is that? Talk about Pshhhhhhhhhhhhh!

Mama en Fuego said...

Tim McGraw's new song "My Little Girl"

Brad Paisly/Dolly Parton's "When I get where I'm going"

Rascal Flatts "Skin" (makes me think of my cousin everytime and I ball like a baby)

Heartlands "I loved her first" OH MY GOD, this is what caused the flood Noah had to build the ark for.

Anonymous said...

I'm completely open w/my sappiness, it is me, I am it. It's sometimes shameful.

"Don't take the Girl" by Tim McGraw

"Where you'd be today" by Kenney Chesney

"He Didn't Have to be" Brad Paisley (the video killed me)

"She didn't have time" Terri Clark (when the guy says "do you have kids?" waaaaahhhhh)

"How Can I help you say goodbye" Patty Loveless

I second "The Dance" by Garth

That was draining. Just think what a CD of all these songs would do to a human?

Must. find. way. to. laugh....

Anonymous said...

The father/daughter song from Wild Thornberries (it's sung/written by Paul Simon) is killer.

I cry every time. Guaranteed.

moosh in indy. said...

So someone said "Didn't have to be" by Brad Paisley. Someone else said "Baby Mine" from Dumbo. But here's my absolute gut kicker:
"Daughters" by John Mayer.


Bea said...

"Cat's in the Cradle" always makes me cry. (And "Butterfly Kisses" is just evil - it makes you cry, and yet feel so ashamed...evil genius, that song.)

Chicky Chicky Baby said...

What the heck is it with country songs? Do they make their living on weepy music or... Wait, I guess they do. Which is why I avoid it like the plague.

Kristen - how the heck did I miss that Wild Thornberry's song. I'm crying just thinking about it. Must add it to the list.

Casey - Ditto on "Daughters". Sniff.

Anonymous said...

"Gracie" - a blogging friend of mine put that on a mix for me and I have to skip over it every time because all I hear is "Tacy" and it makes me weep.

This is why I prefer to listen to Skinny Puppy.

PunditMom said...

I've just come off the Christmas season and all the holiday songs that make be bawl for no good reason (yes, I wrote about!) -- give me "I'll Be Home for Christmas " or "Merry Christmas, Darling" and I break down.

I'm assuming it's partly peri-menopausal, because even tho' I cry at the drop of a hat as a general matter (like you, only when I'm alone or in a dark theater), it's worse these days.

And as for that broken bottle of wine, don't even get me started!

Girl con Queso said...

Great list! Love those Ben Folds tunes! I might have to make the Hurricane an iMix. Hm. I've also been known to ugly cry to "You'll be in my Heart" by Phil Collins. From Tarzan. Talk about cheese. But I so love it.

Erin said...

I've been trying to leave a comment but something is wrong with blogger - as usual. I had this 3 paragraph essay written, but whatever. To sum it up - the best book to make you cry is "Love you forever" - it is perfect for any mom of a boy. Really - it is a must read. It is all about how the mother will love her son till she dies, and how he gets older and she still rocks him back and forth and says I'll love you forever, I'll like you for always, till the day I die, my baby you will be. Man, it gets me every single time I read it to my son.

Jenifer said...

Well Chicky, I see you said you avoid country music like the plague.... but seriously, you must find and listen to "In my daughter's eyes" by Martina Mcbride... better yet, if you can't stomach the thought of listening to something remotely country here are the lyrics because they are too good to not list....

In my daughter's eyes
I am a hero
I am strong and wise and I know no fear
But the truth is plain to see
She was sent to rescue me
I see who I wanna be
In my daughter's eyes

In my daughter's eyes
Everyone is equal
Darkness turns to light
And the world is at peace
This miracle God gave to me
Gives me strength when I am weak
I find reason to believe
In my daughter's eyes

And when she wraps her hand around my finger
How it puts a smile in my heart
Everything becomes a little clearer
I realize what life is all about
Is hanging on when your heart has had enough
Is giving more when you feel like giving up
I've seen the light
In my daughter's eyes

In my daughter's eyes
I can see the future
A reflection of who I am
And what will be
And though she'll grow and someday leave
Maybe raise a family
When I'm gone I hope you'll see
How happy she made me
And I'll be there
In my daughter's eyes

you want to go listen now dontcha?

oh and if you really want to cry, look up "the STreets of Heaven" not sure who sings it though.

Namito said...

I'm still a complete ignoramus about current (or even not so current) music, but I can talk about show tunes...Les Mis.

"On my own"

Every.Time. Reduced to a pathetic, weeping mess. Even when it was sung by a drunk, gay prostitue outside our apartment at 3 in the morning (when we were living at 15th & Spruce, Philadelphia). But for different reasons.

kittenpie said...

Flowers for Zoe, Lenny's slow sweet song for his daughter with Lisa Bonet.

Major Bedhead said...

Little Miss Magic by Jimmy Buffett
Smoke by Ben Folds Five
Cigarette by Ben Folds Five (I love that man. Love. Him.)
I know it's a total cliche, but Fire and Rain by James Taylor can set me off. Just about any James Taylor song can get me teary.
The River by Bruce Springsteen squeezes my heart.

What a great list of songs....

Redneck Mommy said...

For you, my hairy Mrs. Chicky, I will share my soft tender self...

Each of my kids have their own song so that when I hear it I weep like the willow out in my back yard.

For Fric : Have a little Faith In Me - John Hiatt. (Who knew that two hairy dog lovers would have similar tastes...)

For Frac : Heart to Heart(Stelen's Song) - Toby Keith. Yes, country, but I was country before country was cool....

For Shalebug : Well, he died before I could officially decide, but at the time of his death the favored was Unsung Hero - Terri Clark. But I am still looking for a song that fits with our relationship. Post mortem. But I'm determined. (Now there's a weird sentence I bet you never thought you'd read...)

And if you really want an insight into my twisted self, the last song I ever got to play for my Bug was Godspeed (Sweet Dreams) - Dixie Chicks, from their Home album.

We ended up playing it at his funeral and I still can't listen to that song. Either can my husband or our kids.

But it fit, and always will now.

There, I shared. Now I need some damn kleenex and I have to shovel a path for my dog....

Anonymous said...

Fields of Gold and Somewhere over the rainbow sung by Eva Cassidy.

Yes. Let the weep fest begin.

Play that to Dutch and Wood's Flickr pool.

Oh Holy Hell.

Velma said...

It is way too funny that you posted about this, because I was weeping in the car last night on my way out to dinner and a movie because of some song that I can't even remember!

I, too, blame perimenopause. It's gonna be a long decade if I keep bursting into tears listening to the radio.

ewe are here said...

Oohhhhh. Fellow sap here. Great list of songs. I'm not a country music fan, but 'Butterfly Kisses' got me as well. And, even more so, so did 'I Hope You Dance'. Totally!

And my most sung song to my little MF since he was brand new? 'You Are My Sunshine'. It's now his favorite; he knows which button on all his musical toys plays this tune.

~d said...

Natalie Merchant does a song called "Beloved Wife". Always brings tears to my eyes. Umm, SOMEtimes Cat Stevens' "Where do the Children Play", and sometimes the Irish Rovers "Unicorn Song".

There is another one...its country...Its called:
Let them Be Little

(maybe you or one of your readers know the (singer) )


Mom101 said...

Thank you for letting me know I'm not alone. I swear, I'm crying at the stupidest shit since spawning. And yes, that does include Sunrise, Sunset. What can I say, I'm Jewish.

I'd add every song from the Free to Be album. I think it's a nostalgia thing but I hear one bar of the title song...Niagra. Blech.

Anonymous said...

I'm glad I'm not the only one who gets weepy at "100 Years" by Five for Fighting. But the one that gets me, that chokes me up and gets the tears flowing EVERY SINGLE TIME I hear it, is "Lullaby" by the Dixie Chicks:

They didn't have you where I come from
Never knew the best was yet to come
Life began when I saw your face
And I hear your laugh like a serenade
How long do you want to be loved?
Is forever enough, is forever enough?
How long do you want to be loved?
Is forever enough? Cause I'm never ever Giving you up

WAAAAHHHHH!!!!! Seriously, I just got a lump in my throat typing the lyrics. I first heard it right after Kaitlyn was born and it will always remind of her as a newborn. *Sniff*

Girlplustwo said...

ah...nicely done, madame chick, nicely done. will go have a listen to some of that now. very good idea you have.

Whirlwind said...

For some reason, "Mr. Mom" by Lonestar always makes me weepy.

All of the above songs are really good too.

Mama en Fuego said...

"He Didn't Have to be" Brad Paisley

ALWAYS makes me cry because my "Dad" is my step-father. {sniffle)

Lisa said...

"Hi." There's another song I thought of... Its a country music song... I can't remember the name or who sang it... But its about how first the woman, as a girl, her friend moves away. Then as a woman, her hubby leaves her.. THen later, she's sitting with her dying mother... The refrain goes...

How can I help you to say goodbye. Its ok to hurt. Its ok to cry. Come let me hold you and I will try. How can I help you. To say goodbye.

It gets me EVERY freaking time!

Anonymous said...

"Cats in the Cradle" kills me EVERY TIME.

Also "The Lady in Red".

Oh, and does anyone else know "Tell Me on a Sunday"?

Oh forget it. Now I'm a wreck.

Heather said...

The only song guaranteed to reduce me to tears no matter what, no matter when is amazing grace on the bagpipes and another song I associate with a friend's death, but if you're looking for parent songs I have NO IDEA why no one's suggested tears in heaven by Eric Clapton Tears in Heaven (written for his son). That one will get you every time.

Ok I'll admit I kinda get teary when I hear the song my dad and I danced to at my wedding - I wish you love by Rod Stewart, and apart from the intro and a couple of lyrics I think it's totally a great parent-child song.

Anonymous said...

I Hope You Dance.

Makes my eyes well up just thinking of it.

Also? You are my sunshine is the saddest song in the history of the world and anyone who says otherwise is lying.

Anonymous said...

Cats in teh Cradle (I cannot think of the artist at this moment), and that song by Eric Clapton - See you in Heaven (i think that's the title)

I'm pretty sappy myself although you wouldn't know it!

Anonymous said...

Gotta say "Far Away" by Nickelback then I saw the video and that was it even worse sobs. But of course there is nothing like a good country song, many already listed.

ms blue said...

"Isn't She Lovely" by Stevie Wonder makes me gush inside. Yah, I don't ever cry... I've got a heart of steel. Was that believable?

I think stock in Kleenex is on the rise.

Mrs. T said...

Definitely 100 Years. Also that damn 'Christmas Shoes' song.
I have an Art Garfunkel cd called "Songs from a Parent to Child"- pretty much the whole thing makes me weep, but especially "I'll Lasso the Moon for You". Crying just thinking about it.
And? the theme song from the Mary Tyler Moore show. Seriously.

Anonymous said...

Yeah, I couldn't read the whole list from work since you kept MAKING ME CRY AT WORK!


Anyhoo, great list. And I'm glad commenters extraordinaire included "Isn't She Lovely" and "In My Daughter's Eyes."


karengreeners said...

sunshine on my shoulders - john denver
standing on the moon - grateful dead
bird song - jerry garcia
edelweiss - stop laughing
isn't she lovely - stevie wonder, mostly because my friend walked down the aisle to it without her dad because he had died.

and redneck mama's comment made me start crying just now. and that pampers 'silent night' commercial gets me every bleedin time. saps. the lot of us.

Sparky Duck said...

In Your eyes, though they are happy tears.

Looks like Tim McGraw has some sort of cornering of sad songs, since I will add Live Like you were Dying.

Love Will Come to You-Indigo Girls, or there version of the River at an especially low Christmas moment.

yea but guys dont cry anyway

petite gourmand said...

don't forget Madonna's "little star" or "papa don't preach"
sniff sniff...

Her Bad Mother said...

Nina Simone's 'Beautiful Land' - it's not about parents and children, but it's the sweetest song, and it's how I want my daughter to see the world.

Jess Riley said...

I get choked up at that White Stripes song, too!!!

Mine's an easy one: "I Will Follow You into the Dark" by Death Cab for Cutie. I cry every damn time.

Jess Riley said...

( is it:

Mad said...

A couple of relics from my ancient past:
Father and Son: Cat Stevens
Cat's in the Cradle: Harry Chapin

carrie said...

I think I cried a box 'o Kleenex just reading that.

All I have to add would be:

Teach Your Children - Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young.

Somewhere Over The Rainbow - That famous deceased Hawaiian with the beautiful ukelelee.

Love your post!


Creative-Type Dad said...

"Ballarina Girl" - Lionel Richie.
Brings tears to my eyes every time....

(well, no not really)

Anonymous said...

beaches turns me into a blubbering fool....

Anonymous said...

I'm with Carrie - Israel Kamakawiwo'ole 's version of 'Over The Rainbow' gets me bawling everytime, especially since I remember it from ER and the scene where Dr. Greene is dying.

God, I'm a sap.

Justice Fergie said...

Oooo!! Definitely "To Zion"! That's a good one.

Avalon said...

Phil Collins, "You'll be in my heart":

"For one so small,you seem so strong
My arms will hold you keep you safe and warm
This bond between us can't be broken
I will be here don't you cry

And you'll be in my heart
Yes, you'll be in my heart
From this day on
Now and forever more
You'll be in my heart
No matter what they say
You'll be here in my heart

I don't cry in public, but I heard this song one day in a McDonald's and I was weeping like a fool. The staff probably thought I was psychotic.

Anonymous said...

Eric Clapton's Tears in Heaven. Saddest song ever.

Oh & I saw that ec mentioned the book "Love You Forever." I have never once made it through that entire book without crying & it scares my little boy when the waterworks appear, so now I just read it privately and weep while my husband laughs at me. (But I've seen him secretly weeping through it too!)

Lawyer Mama said...

Eric Clapton's Tears in Heaven. Saddest song ever.

Oh & I saw that ec mentioned the book "Love You Forever." I have never once made it through that entire book without crying & it scares my little boy when the waterworks appear, so now I just read it privately and weep while my husband laughs at me. (But I've seen him secretly weeping through it too!)

Lawyer Mama said...

Eric Clapton's Tears in Heaven. Saddest song ever.

Oh & I saw that ec mentioned the book "Love You Forever." I have never once made it through that entire book without crying & it scares my little boy when the waterworks appear, so now I just read it privately and weep while my husband laughs at me. (But I've seen him secretly weeping through it too!)

Lawyer Mama said...

Eric Clapton's Tears in Heaven. Saddest song ever.

Oh & I saw that ec mentioned the book "Love You Forever." I have never once made it through that entire book without crying & it scares my little boy when the waterworks appear, so now I just read it privately and weep while my husband laughs at me. (But I've seen him secretly weeping through it too!)

Lawyer Mama said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Lawyer Mama said...

Eric Clapton's Tears in Heaven. Saddest song ever.

Oh & I saw that ec mentioned the book "Love You Forever." I have never once made it through that entire book without crying & it scares my little boy when the waterworks appear, so now I just read it privately and weep while my husband laughs at me. (But I've seen him secretly weeping through it too!)

Lawyer Mama said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
megachick said...

great post. i am a total sap. the songs i can think of that weren't already mentioned are 'there goes my life' by kenny chesney and 'my wish' by rascall flats. also 'return to pooh corner' by kenny loggins and 'puff the magic dragon' we put those last two on a mixed cd for our daughter and one day driving down the road, my husband and i both burst into tears. sheesh. also, my husband balls like a baby when he hears that 'christmas shoes' song, too.

Amy said...

Arrrrgh! I'm about a week late in reading and responding to this, but great list!! And oddly, another blogger posted a very similar thing earlier this week -- I had been helping her compile her list, which was defined a little bit differently but looks very similar in the end. It's here:

Anonymous said...

I'm not sure how I stumbled onto your blog, but wow...I'm with ya. I just about had to pull over this morning...listening to Five for Fighting, I think the song is called "I Just Love You". about a sobbin' mess by the time I got to work.

Love your blog by the way!

Anonymous said...

I know you are mostly women, but I love sad songs. I am a former pro baseball player but still have an emotional side. Listen to these and tell me you didn't tear up.
Dear Mr. Jesus by Powersource
Heaven 911 Remix
Butterflies for Bucky by Bobby Goldsboro
and the newest Alyssa Lies
I have a list of about 200 sad songs if anyone would like to talk about them and share some of yours. My email and yahoo IM is
Take care all and never be afraid to wear your emotions on your sleeves. That's what my dad always did. He was my best frined and I lost him at the age of 53. I guess God does take the good ones first.

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