Scene: My bathroom.
Our heroine (that would be me) steps out of her shower after quickly washing off the sweat from that morning's power walk. The one where she pushed more than 40 pounds of child plus a big ass stroller up and down some tricky hills for a couple of miles.
Okay, not super tricky, and not necessarily bigger than your average hill, but they seemed that way to me.
Fine. They were probably no bigger than your average ANT hill. But to me they were my Everest.
Anyway...
Our heroine steps out of her shower and steps in front of the mirror to survey the damage her recent childbirth and crazed cookie consumption did to her once smokin' bod.
Okay, maybe not smokin', but definitely doable. If you catch my drift.
Anyway...
Next to her sits her three year old daughter. A vision in a cat hair covered t-shirt and that morning's breakfast still on her cheeks.
Woman [sighing and making faces at herself in the mirror while grabbing at her love handles and stomach roll]: I'm fat and I don't like it one bit.
Child [playing with cheap Mardi Gras-type beads while sitting on a pile of towels that need to be washed, chanting]: Fat Mommy, Fat Mommy. Fat Mommy, Fat Mommy. [pausing to assess] Yep, you're fat Mommy.
Woman: You're not supposed to agree with me. You're supposed to tell me you think I'm beautiful no matter what.
Child [thinking]: Hmmm. You're beautiful, Mommy.
Woman: Thanks, hon.
Child [dancing away]: And fat. No matter what.
Tuesday, August 19, 2008
Out of the mouths of skinny babes
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34 comments:
Hahaha! Does that ever sound just like something my daughters - yep, both of them - would say to me. *sigh*
They're so honest. So. Brutally. Honest.
Fat. No matter what.
That's exactly how I've been feeling for the last 6+ months.
Score! for Chicky Chicky.
as far as i'm concerned, the issue is that we are never able to shower alone.
*snort*
Gosh, gotta love the Chicky.
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! That is hilarious. I live for these kind of lines out of The Boss, even when they come at my expense.
But you should be proud of yourself for powerwalking multiple miles. You'll get back into shape, no doubt.
We have stricken the word fat from our house for this reason alone. Call me an asshat, but not fat.
Hahaha. Chicky is too funny.
Good for you for walking all those hills.
RC caught me hopping into the shower the other day: Mommy, you've got a bum! A BIG bum.
STFU, kid.
I'm sorry, but I can't stop laughing here...literally can't.stop.laughing. That kid is too smart for her own good, and I swear one of my kids could/would say the same damn thing to me.
LOL.. gotta love kids and their brutal honesty! I am very impressed with your ability to walk up Everest with your stroller...!
lol
d gave me a similar comment a few weeks ago. Not good for the ego, but good for the motivation. :)
Oh Chicky! Just keep pushing that stroller up those hills. You'll show her.
By the way, BTDT the day my daughter told me my "big butt" would pop her inflatable pool. ::sigh::
Well, um, she needs some work on her diplomacy skills, but she's still cute as can be.
You're not fat. You're just...empty. Pretty soon your body will figure it out and snap back.
That's what they say, right? RIGHT??
Tee hee hee! I've been on the receiving end of comments like that.
Oh my Goodness! You deserve an award for that! So here you go!
I am waiting for that to happen to me. Esp. as I am on my second piece of pizza and it is nearly 10pm. Sigh.
Aww darn kids. Gotta love em!
Mrs C~~~~ I tried really, really hard not to laugh at that.
Really.
I'm with kgirl on this.
Can't see you as fat, can only see little Chicky as being funny.
Really this is okay and funny?
I don't see the humor, I see you teaching your child futrue self image problems. I also see a child who has been listening to you say you're fat more than once. I see a child that needs to taught to say beautful things, like love, I love you mommy...not fat mommy.
I'm pretty sure she meant "phat". It's just that she can't spell yet.
You're totally phat.
No matter what.
Ya. I'm with Jenny.
You're totally phat.
Besides, I'd do you in a New York second. And I have great taste.
Have you seen Y's Community Keynote from BlogHer?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4b1d0GoIG2s&e
It's okay - Katie pats my mushy stomach and says "I did that," and I say, "yes, yes you did." :)
I feel your pain, hon... the other day, Greyson had a moment where he decided that he had nothing better to do than poke at my belly and giggle that it was "squishy." Followed up by a questioning, "Does it wiggle like Jell-o?"
Ugh.
BTW, I added you to my blogroll! =)
Oh the LOVE!
Oh yeah! Nothing like the unconditional love of a child, and the brutal honesty :)
Just found you via Twitter.
LOL... yeah apparently I've got a "fat butt" according to the peanut gallery.
PHAT, no matter what. Right?
Hahaha! Monkey called me an elephant the other day. It was quite disturbing.
LMBO! oh my god! I can relate though. The ONE time I actually do some shopping for ME! Of course I have 4 children with me and have to take them all into the extra large change room. I am about to try on a pair of pants when my daugther asks me (very loudly of course) "why are your panties are sooooo big!?" As if that were not bad enough....my other daughters tell her (also very loudly) "Because Mom has a really big bum!" Gee...thanx kids! We went straight more...did not try anything else on, did not go to the checkout, did not pass go and collect $200.
lol went straight home not MORE!
**note to self - proof read BEFORE posting!
I tried to smother the chuckle - but was unsucessful... can't wait to have those conversations with my own little one... in a few years :)
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