So you can take that cookie and stick it up your, Yeah! Stick it up your, Yeah!

The title of this post has nothing to do with the content and everything to do with that damn Limp Bizkit song being stuck in my head, even though I have not heard that song in at least two years. Which is why I asked you all to ask me questions, any question you wanted, so that I wouldn't be forced to abuse my brain any more than necessary to come up with new and exciting blog entries during this lovely phase of pregnancy some call the Last Trimester and I call the Seventh Circle of Hell.

Let's start the answerin', shall we?

Oh, but before we begin I must commend those of you who were willing to play along. You didn't just lob softballs at me. No, these are 95 mph, Roger Clemens hopped up on steroids aiming at Mike Piazza's head like it was the target of a dunk tank fastballs. Thanks for taking it easy on the pregnant chick.

/sarcasm


I'm going to start with some of the easier ones.

Jessica asked: If you could have dinner with four fiction characters... who would they be?

I'm not sure if she meant fiction, as in characters from books, or fictional and she just missed the a and the l and she really meant any character from a book, television show or movie. I'm going to go with the latter since I can't for the life of me think of any books I've read besides the one I'm currently reading.

The baby. She's. Eating. My. Brain. Nom nom nom.

1. Martin Blank - Grosse Point Blank. (played by John Cusack)
Hands down, one of my favorite movies ever. Wouldn't you want to share a nice bottle of cabarnet and a good steak with a killer-for-hire? You would if he looked like John Cusack.

2. John Amsterdam - New Amsterdam.
He's lived for 400 years so you know he's got some great stories. Plus? He's HAWT and I have naughty dreams about him. Good looks are not a requirement for dinner with me but they don't hurt.

3. Lassie - How else will we know if someone's fallen down a well while we're enjoying our hors d'oeurves? And she can eat all the fatty pieces of steak that crowd my plate and impede my progress.

4. God - When someone convinces me He's real I'll move Him out of the "fictional" category.

(See, I say that but I totally had to capitalize He and Him because you never know where that lightning bolt is coming from.)


Moving right along, All Things BD asked: What TYPE of cookie crumbs are currently scattered across your chest? Also translates into, If you had to pick just one cookie to marry, what type would it be?

My cookie of choice these days, and the ones whose crumbs covered my chest on that day, are the peanut butter patty Girl Scout cookies. I would totally marry that cookie and pledge my life forever and ever to it and have little peanut butter cookie babies with it. And then I'd eat them.

But seriously, when my last box is gone I think I'll cry a little. Okay, I'll have a full blown melt down complete with rendering my garments and throwing crystal vases. I may need to seek professional help.

(Note to self - Must find way to birth peanut butter cookies.)


My girl MotherBumper asked: If you could learn any single skill a la Matrix (ie. upload to the Mrs. Chicky platform with no significant effort), what ONE skill would that be?

This was an easy one. The ability to wear skin tight leather and look fabulous doing so.


Heather asked: What's your favorite book and why?

Damn. Couldn't escape the book question forever, I suppose.

I'm going to go with the easy answer - A Tree Grows in Brooklyn by Betty Smith. This book left the biggest impact on the young girl I once was - many, many years ago - and I can't even remember how many times I read it. I can't wait until Chicky is old enough to read it for herself.

Just My Life asked: Favorite cartoon character and why?

Just one? Damn.

This one is, of course, subject to change because I refuse to commit to just one. I'll commit to one today but tomorrow is another day.

Pinky and the Brain. I know, technically they're two characters but you can't have one without the other. You can't try to take over the world without a good Snarf.

Don't believe me? Watch this.


How about one more before I call it a day? Mama Tulip asked: Best concert you've ever seen? And...how about worst concert (or live performance) you've ever seen?

This was tougher than it needed to be, but only because I've seen a lot of shows and have a tendency to forget some of them even when I'm not pregnant. Like those Grateful Dead shows I attended. I know I was there but they're a little hazy.

Ahem.

For the best I'm going to say Fleetwood Mac in 1997, their reunion tour to promote The Dance. I've always loved Stevie Nicks and to see her sing again with Lindsey Buckingham was almost more than my poor, sentimental heart could take. It didn't even matter that a monsoon was raging just outside our covered seats at Great Woods and we were getting soaked to the bone. It was worth it to hear "Landslide" live. I'm getting a little vklempt just thinking about it.

Talk amongst yourselves.

The worst concert has to have been Smashing Pumpkins at the Wallace Civic Center in... '94? They didn't sound all that great to begin with but then they started to insult the crowd. For what I can't remember because I was too busy trying not to lose my younger sister and her friend in the angry mob. But let this be a lesson to you up and coming rock bands. Never, EVER, verbally abuse a bunch of drunk kids who are hopped up on pure adrenaline from moshing and crowd surfing. I'm surprised the band got out of there alive. I stopped listening to the Pumpkins after that show.



And this is where I'm going to stop for today. I've got lots more to answer but I'm tired and a certain box of Peanut Butter Patties has been giving me the eye all night. What can I say? When peanut butter cookies give you that come hither look, I come hither.